Friday, September 6, 2013

Today I am a Success Story.....

I'm not sure if I mentioned this but I work on my laptop seemingly sometime around the clock it's required by my job.... though I'm not sure if you can call my work a job.  You see I work for the man I love. Yes, it's work, yes - it's a job but basically I'm a "His Girl Friday" This really has nothing to do with what I'm going to say but I thought you may need some background atmosphere.

I work on my laptop constantly and let's face it sometimes I get distracted. Did I mention I have ADD? On one of my very recent distractions I began doing research on rings. I like unusual jewelry and am looking for a unique piece for my right hand.  It is then I came across the work of Ashley Weber.  Her work is amazing, original and everything in between. I made an inquiry about her work and we connected through Instagram where she saw my images and made a comment on one.  I ended up checking our her blog site and this was the first post I read of hers. The impact was monumental.

A few years ago, I was a different person.
Fueled by something that had only grown larger by the day.
Three stamps from going postal.

A few years ago I was not only unhappy, I was angry.
Fire ran through every vein.
Toxic thoughts and something so painful I could hardly hold on.
My whole world- something burning, something molten, mind run by an indescribable demon that I had let myself fall victim to.
I gave in, gave up, gave way too much.

I failed to see the sprouts of life growing from in between the cracks of concrete- the perfect geometry of a succulent- the survival instincts written deep in the bones of the animals around me.
I was so lost, so deep in my pain, that I walked through life with my eyes closed.
What I could see was black and white, and what I didn't know, didn't exist.

It was one day on vacation, driving with a friend, that I said... this is it.
Things are going to change.
Things have to change.

Today I am a success story.
A survivor.
A girl looking through the 8 eyes of a spider at every tiny, beautiful thing.
Today, the world around me is more giving, more glorious, far more vibrant than I could ever even begin to believe.

As another friend of mine preaches to me daily, "Success is deliberate."
If you truly want something you wont make excuses.
You'll fall and you will rise.
You'll look to the sky instead of down at your feet.
You'll hold on with both hands and your heart.
And you'll keep swimming.
You will swim no matter how deep you sink.
Because you want it.
You honestly and wholeheartedly want it.

That day I instilled in myself the power of positive thinking.
Rejecting the negative.
Refusing the ugly.
Relinquishing the past.
Never looking back.

And today, I am here.
Today, every color within me shines.

I am happy.
Genuinely, perfectly, undeniably, happy.

Thank you to everyone who has ever supported me.
Thank you for reading my words.
Thank you for understanding that I too, am human.
Thank you for letting me be honest.
Thank you for letting me leave my past behind.

You are appreciated far beyond words.


1 comment:

  1. Wow, just saw this. I am so behind, but this made my day. I am so very glad to know that I am not alone. You are so very right. Love yourself, when you do, that light will shine and others will love you too. Treat yourself right, always.... finding happiness.. it was the best thing I ever looked for. xox -ashley